The Slow-Cooked Sentence

Five things needed to induce sleep in a toddler

Rachael Conlin Levy
Courtesy of Elfleda.

One story
Two breasts filled with milk
Three songs: “Twinkle Star,” “You Are My Sunshine” and, finally, the national anthem
Four kisses
Five drinks of water

Then, we begin a cycle that looks something like this, and continues throughout the night:

Ivan in his big boy bedivan grumpyIvan in his big boy bed
ivan grumpyIvan in his big boy bedivan grumpy

Which means there’s a problem with sleep, or lack thereof, in my house. Maybe he has sleep apnea? You know, when someone stops breathing for a second or two and so wakes up a lot, I suggested to my husband. More like sleep asshole-nea, he replied.

3 responses to “Five things needed to induce sleep in a toddler”

  1. mochiv says:

    Sleep asshole-nea!!! That's hilarious.

  2. mamapease says:

    You make me laugh. Ok, Do you think Ivan is getting too much nap during the day?

  3. That cracked me up, totally sounds like something my husband would say.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Subscribe: rss | email | twitter